|
Thesis Statements
|
Ms. O’s comments
|
|
Although Raskolnikov is plagued with guilt for the majority of the novel, he is able to temporarily distract himself when aiding the Marmeladovs and protecting his sister.
^ I can then use the Marmeladovs as a paragraph and Duonia as a paragraph... each has multiple examples...
* I have 6 solid examples
* I have 2 major ideas so far
1. Helping others gives him a sense of belonging (since he's needed)
2. Reminds him that he is not the center of the universe
|
Good ideas. I cannot tell the topics of the body paragraphs from the thesis. Try incorporating the "2 major ideas" into the thesis. Could you structure paragraphs around those or do they overlap?
Where will you fit in the "2 major ideas"?
|
|
Due to the complexities of the human psyche examined in Crime And Punishment it can be philosophized that suffering not only acts as a ubiquitous entity but a necessity, a balance, a citadel which without many would be rendered lost in the hysteria of the mind, portrayed by Rodya, Sonia and Marmeladov.
|
Please bring this back to earth. Such lofty diction has me dizzy.
|
|
(I didn't listen to directions above...)
Although Raskolnikov is plagued with guilt for the majority of the novel, he is able to temporarily distract himself when aiding the Marmeladovs and protecting his sister.
^ I can then use the Marmeladovs as a paragraph and Duonia as a paragraph... each has multiple examples...
|
I then broke the rules too - see green above.
|
| The moralities and moral transformations of Raskolnikov and Svidrigailov are essentially the same; however, Raskolnikov's tremedous capacity for self reflection compared with Svidrigailov's inability to do so causes a difference in their sense of responsibility and their final actions. |
intriguing |
| Svidrigailov's base and selfish nature directly contrasts Sonia's religious morals, yet Raskolnikov's interactions with each character hugely influence his decision to confess. |
How do they influence him? |
| Raskolnikov does not alone come to the decision to confess the crime he has commited; both Sonya Marmeladova and Porfiry Petrovich are formidible forces whom drive him to this decision. |
Clear argument and structure - good
Grammar notes: who drive him...
both refers to two not three
|
| Raskolinov's relationship with Sonia and his dislike for Svidrigailov foreshadow his confession. |
I find myself wanting more but am not sure what to ask... How? Why? I will reread later too. |
| Katie and Olivia -- you may need to reenter yours if they are not above... |
|
|
Due to the complexities of the human psyche examined in Crime And Punishment it can be surmised that suffering not only plays a major role in human life but acts as a necessary object of survival as seen with Rodya, Marmeladov and Sonia.
-Yeah...I went a bit overboard up there. I may change the topic entirely because this topic has already been so largely covered, but first i must think of that something else.
|
Much clearer!
Now try eliminating the passive (just cut "it can be surmised"). Could also streamline phrasing of "acts as a necessary object of survival" -- keep idea, just cut wording.
|
|
Due to Rodya's admittance of his fault, the acceptance of his guilt for his actions and the love and companionship of Sonia, he is able to reform and repent thus bringing hope to his hopless life.
- Second idea.
|
Why?
Just make sure this does not become plot summary.
|
| Svidrigailov's base and selfish nature directly contrasts Sonia's religious morals, yet Raskolnikov's interactions with each character lead him to examine his own morality, influencing his decision to confess. |
Better with addition
More specific is usually better.
|
| The thoughts, feelings and actions of Raskolnikov, Svidrigailov and Sonia demonstrate that the morality of man is soley determined by environmental factors. |
Wow. Can you prove this? Intriguing. |
| In Fyodor Dostoevsky's "Crime and Punishment," Raskolnikov's undeniable need to confess can be partially ascribed to his mounting need for human contact, which grows only more unbearable as he realizes that he is perhaps no better than his fellow human beings. This is demonstrated in his string of confessions, first to Sonia, then to Dounia and finally to the police, an escalation that occurs as his disillusionment with his theory progresses. |
Good ideas.
What exactly will you prove in each paragraph? Do you want to structure the essay around specific confessions or around stages in his disilusionment?
Can you streamline the thesis into one sentence? (Essays tend to be tighter overall with one sentence thesis statements.)
Do his quasi-confessions to Zametov, etc. fit into your argument?
|
| Suffering is a character all of its own in Dostoevsky's "Crime and Punishment". Raskolnikov, Marmeladov and Sonia are three different people with very conflicting sins, yet all suffer in some way because of their actions. |
Intriguing opening sentence.
The second sentence seems more observation than analysis. Keep pushing ideas further. Ask WHY?, HOW? and make points more specific... (all aiming to get to a more analytical, debatable statement you need to (and can) prove). How is their suffering the same? How is it different? Why? What effect does suffering have on each? Why? How do their sins affect their suffering? Why?
|
| While Raskolnikov and Svidrigailov both led sinful lives, Raskolnikov’s confession and penitent suffering in Siberia reveal that he does in fact have the super human tendencies he dreamed of, while Svidrigailov’s suicide demonstrates his lack of strength and his ordinary soul. |
Nice contrast. Cool to pull in RRR's theory...but a few questions:
Does RRR have the exact super human forces he theorized?
How will you prove these points?
|
| The novel is propelled by Raskolnikov's internal conflict between his delusions of superiority and his subconscious understanding of the moral depravity of murder which is in part resolved by his confession and ultimately cemented by the maturity acquired after his epihany with Sonia. |
How will you prove "the novel is propelled by"... ?
What exactly is cemented by his new maturity?
|
|
Throughout the novel, the further Raskólnikov distances himself from his mother, his sister, and Razumihin, the greater each relationship decreases in sincerity and affection. This illustrates one of the novel’s prominent themes; alienation from society.
|
What is the MESSAGE about "alienation from society"? (theme = message)
"The greater each relationship decreases" - odd phrasing... The further he distances himself..., the less sincere and affectionate the relationship?
|
|
Raskolnikov's compulsive need to return to society, as seen in his early pseudo-confessions, in his confessions to Sonia and to Dounia, and ultimately in his confession to the police is caused by his mounting disillusionment as he realizes that he is inescapably no better than his fellow human beings.
(my point is that as he realizes that he is part of the society he scorns he also realizes that he cannot escape from it, utimately submitting to society's punishment.
|
Can you avoid passive voice.
Part in parentheses makes sense too. Helpful to have two different phrasings, so not exact repetition in conclusion, for example.
|
| Dostoyevsky makes effective use of dreams in Crime and Punishment. The dreams of various characters throughout various points in the novel serve as elements of foreshadowing, metaphors, and motives that drive characters to make important decisions. |
Good topic. Try to make phrasing more specific: What is "effective use"?
"throughout various points in the novel" does not add to the sentence.
Can you combine the two sentences?
Is "elements of" needed?
Will you have a paragraph on foreshadowing, a paragraph on metaphors and one on motives, each with multiple examples?
|
|
In Doestoevsky’s Crime and Punishment, Raskolnikov feels a need for suffering only because of other’s emphasis on the necessity of punishment, and feels conscious guilt only from the undeserved faith that others place in him.
(I want to say that he is guilted into confession by the guidance of others’ morals, not his own)
|
|
|
Throughout the course of Crime and Punishment, Doestoevsky conveys the idea that suffering is a necessity in the human experience. The character Raskolnikov struggles with inner turmoil of guilt, paranoia, and a desire to remain free.
|
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
| |
|
Comments (0)
You don't have permission to comment on this page.